Misery and Maximizers

John Maeda made a brilliant observation in his TED talk about simplicity.  To paraphrase: people like complexity in things they enjoy, and they hate complexity in things they dislike.  Yes!  Complexity in music & books captivates me, complexity in my tax returns makes me want to jump in front of a train.

In 2010, I’ll be trying to reduce some of the unnecessary complexities in my life.  As an organization freak & computer lover with a subconscious lust for complex systems, this won’t be easy, but I think Maeda’s point provides excellent guidance.

I’m also getting some terrific input from a book called The Paradox of Choice by Barry Schwartz, a psychologist and professor at Swarthmore College.  The book aims to explain why a culture with greater freedom & variety than any other in history is causing people to be unhappier and less satisfied with their decisions.  In Chapter 4, Schwartz explains the difference between maximizers (those who must find the best possible choice for every decision) and satisficers (those who settle for good enough and don’t worry about the existence of better possibilities).  Guess which one correlates more strongly with less satisfaction with life, less happiness, less optimism, and more depression?  As a solid maximizer (as evaluated by the survey in the book), I wasn’t happy to learn the answer.

One recurring theme of the book: reducing the number of options often leads to greater satisfaction with a decision.  I think that’s something I can work with.

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This week, the girl you see here turned 25.

You might think a 25-year-old should be more mature.  I blame her boyfriend for being a bad influence.

Big news!… that I can’t talk about right now

Hi, everyone.  I have some big deal, hot shit, life-altering news that I’d like to talk about, but it’s in my best interests not to go postin’ all over the interwebs about it.  Alas, this is a teaser post.  Individual inquiries about said news, addressed directly to me via email or face to face, are welcomed.

Since the news hit, I’ve been indulging in two of the biggest technology-enabled time wasters in existence: Facebook and Twitter.  Neither of these fads really caught on with me until I started desperately seeking distractions.  Boy, do I ever understand them now.

I also got my hands on Final Fantasy XII for PlayStation 2 – or rather, it got its hands on me.  It sucks me in for 3- or 4-hour stretches from which I emerge bleary-eyed and delirious.  I’m filled with shame at the amount of time I’m investing in an activity that provides me with no value.  It’s not even like I find it very entertaining, which should be the sole motivating factor for playing a video game.  I’m simply driven by a sick compulsion to complete the game’s assigned tasks one at a time, to enjoy that gratification of achieving something.  The hardcore role playing gamer in me just loves watching my characters’ numbers (strength, vitality, etc.) go up.

My whole point in starting a game of FFXII was to indulge myself for a little while, but I’m not enjoying it the way that I’d hoped.  Hard to say if this is due to the caliber of the game or to my inability to let myself enjoy something that doesn’t make me a better person – and God, what a lame person I’d be if the cause turned out to be the latter.  Enjoying something for enjoyment’s sake is what indulging is all about.

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Hey, I’m going to be in Pittsburgh this weekend.  What should I do there?

Stories of the Road, issue 33: The Great Gray North

This blog post is long overdue, but with good reason.  My latest client is headquartered in Vancouver, a city that's been on my top destination list for quite a while.  I was determined to make the best of my time there, thus I resolved to spend my weeknights seeing Vancouver rather than writing about it.

I'm never sure how much my feelings about a new city are influenced by my predispositions.  I've long imagined Vancouver as a Canadian San Francisco, so I had an easy time spotting similarities: the waterfront geography, the West-coast attitudes, the seafood-heavy menus.  There was even a dense fog (which the locals repeatedly assured me was uncharacteristic) languishing in the streets for most of my stay, reinforcing the impression that Vancouver was separated at birth from its American counterpart.

Vancouver's air is charged with the same ineffable energy found in other distinguished metropolitan locations.  I felt it as I walked to pick up dinner after work, wearing a smile that seemed to spring from my chest cavity.  I'm not a spiritual man, but I'm positive that some cities radiate a metaphysical verve yet undefined by science.

The travel requirements for this project were aggressive: Sunday night arrival and Friday afternoon departure for four weeks straight.  Lucy flew in for a ski weekend in between.  I tested my snowboarding skills, which were almost so rusty as to be worthless.  After three hours of scraping down the face of Grouse Mountain in thrift-store snowpants, my ass was ready to mutiny.

The food quality was top notch throughout town.  The sushi restaurant population downtown seems too large to be sustainable.  I never had a bad piece of fish in my time there, and I'm certain that my blood now contains enough mercury to manufacture several thermometers.  Oh, and let's not forget the poutine.

Why hasn't America appropriated this dish yet?  It certainly meets our minimum legal requirements for sodium, cheese, and fried food content.

Kudos to monstro (AKA Steve Wolfhard) and his friends for showing us a good time at Gyoza King.  Lucy drew a fantastic Vancouver travel journal when she vacationed with her dad last fall, so I have to plug it one more time.

Cautiously optimistic vs. caustically homophobic

From Obama election night rally 2008-11-04

Like most Democrats, progressives, and young people out there, I was elated when CNN announced that Barack Obama had won the presidency.  Obama ran an outstanding campaign and made a lot of great promises.  Most of my friends have astronomically large expectations of our president-elect.  It will be interesting to see how the next four years play out, especially with a firmly Democratic Congress.  I'm optimistic, but wary.  The sooner that first piece of progressive legislation comes out of the White House, the sooner I really believe that this administration is different from George W. Bush's.  Maybe it's been too long since I had faith in our federal government.

My favorite shot from the celebration: Jesse Jackson weeping.

Photo from Getty Images by AFP/Getty Images

My favorite part of Obama's acceptance speech: his inclusion of gays in a list of proud American demographics.

"Its the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Latino, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled - Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been a collection of Red States and Blue States: we are, and always will be, the United States of America."

By the way, California: What the hell?  Almost 6 million of you voted Yes on Proposition 8?!  I'm not surprised to hear this from Florida, but you, California?  Ugh.  Lucy and I are planning to join a Prop 8 protest downtown on Saturday the 15th.  Let me know if you're interested in coming.

Brief video of Lucy, Kelly, Joe, and I listening to the beginning of Obama's victory speech in Grant Park, along with about 240,000 other people:

From Obama election night rally 2008-11-04

Euphoric nostalgia

In her latest book, What It Is, Lynda Barry provides methods, exercises and general motivation for getting your creative juices flowing.  Large portions of the book are dedicated to memories: What is a memory?  What is the past?  Where (and why) do we keep bad memories?  Why are memories important?  A few recent blasts from the past have had me thinking over these questions.

I downloaded a fan-subbed version of the first Rebuild of Evangelion movie.  For those who don't know, I was a huge anime fan in college and Neon Genesis Evangelion is my favorite series - hell, it's pretty much my favorite anything.  Books, albums, movies... I have to admit that my #1 spot remains shamefully devoted to a Japanese cartoon from 1996.

The new Eva movies are a reanimating/retelling of the original story: about 3/4 of the scenes remain basically the same, but look nicer and sometimes have computer-animated additions.  Of course, this means 1/4 of the scenes are (shudder of spine-tingling anticipation)... NEW.

Here's the great part: they didn't fuck things up with the new stuff.  (Are you reading this, George Lucas?)

It was awesome.  It was so awesome.  For 97 minutes, I was bursting with this feeling that was a combination of nostalgia and euphoria; I don't know of any English word to adequately describe it, but we could damn sure use one.  I was literally giggling when I paused the movie halfway through to polish off the remains of our pantry's cookie stash.

When the new X-Files movie came out earlier this summer, Lucy went through the same thing: almost two hours of fantasy bliss, revived straight from her adolescence.

It's a rare privilege to be transported so completely back into your past by something brand new.  When I was watching that movie, I felt the Evangelion feeling; there's no other way for me to define it.

Three more Eva movies are planned for release over the next 2-3 years.  Funny to realize that I already know exactly how I'll feel when I watch those as well.

The Move, Part One

Tomorrow morning, I'm hopping on a 6:55 AM flight to Boston, where I'll meet Lucy and her mom and then drive 2 hours to White River Junction, VT.  For the next 2 days, we'll be packing Lucy's stuff up and loading it into a van, and for 2 days after that we'll haul it all to Chicago.  On Tuesday, July 1st, we arrive in Chicago, load my stuff into the van, and bring it all to Logan Square for The Unpacking.  All able-bodied men & women who are willing to help will earn my unending gratitude - and, more importantly, will be fed with Lou Malnati's pizza and the beverage of your choice (beer included).

It's been 4 years since I last changed addresses, and there's one thing that has really surprised me above all else: it is HARD to get rid of your stuff in an ecologically friendly way!  Actually, let me modify that statement: it's not too hard, but it does take planning.  Selling stuff on eBay & Craig's List, giving things away on Freecycle, disposing of hazardous waste properly... all of these things require scheduling far in advance of the move.  It must have been a month ago that I started taking my clothes to Milwaukee Ave. to see if Crossroads or Buffalo Exchange would take them.  I've now reached the point where I'm so sick of looking at my own stuff and wondering why I have it - what the hell am I doing with 9 pairs of shoes, anyway? - that I'm about two boxloads away from renouncing all physical possessions and moving to India.  If the happiest man in the world did it, why shouldn't I?

 

Tuesday the 1st, big move-in party at my old place and then my new place, please come and join the fun!